barbidreamdumpster:

if you want to ask a bisexual or asexual person about their sexual history to verify that they’re queer, but you don’t want them to take it the wrong way, try this useful communication technique:

give them twenty dollars and go away.

riversclara:

Doctor Who in a nutshell.

consulting-cannibal:

based on this text post because that shit is CUTE AS HELL DAMMIT

nathanieljosephruess:

am i bisexual? am i pansexual? am i gay? well officer mostly i’m just sad

dtkrushnics:

i get so fucking emotional thinking about how much misha got bullied as a child.

i mean, i was bullied when i was younger. it led to a lot of problems for me, health-wise, and it would get to the point where i would start having panic attacks on the way to school thinking…

panicrobot:

This man was our president for EIGHT YEARS. We are never gonna live this down

toocooltobehipster:

raptorific:

I hit words at random on iOS 8’s new predictive text feature so I could see what type of sentence my phone thinks I’m likely to say, and

image

is this how jaden smith writes his tweets?

totallynotagentphilcoulson:

redvedev:

kurt-l-fahrenheit:

paredolia:

momanddadaism:

jesus fucking christ piglet what the fuck

no it’s ok, pooh had it coming

shit

wow what a douche

yeah no really don’t feel sorry for him he’s a butthole

This post is now 80% better.

jfc pooh bear

I still think the funniest thing about all these comics is that they’re all legit official comics

totallynotagentphilcoulson:

redvedev:

kurt-l-fahrenheit:

paredolia:

momanddadaism:

jesus fucking christ piglet what the fuck

no it’s ok, pooh had it coming

image

shit

image

wow what a douche

image

yeah no really don’t feel sorry for him he’s a butthole

This post is now 80% better.

jfc pooh bear

I still think the funniest thing about all these comics is that they’re all legit official comics

thesugarray:

lostdoughnut:

fuckerpunch:

i never realize how much i swear until i’m in a situation where i can’t

true story: i tried avoiding saying ‘bitch’ in front of a kid so my mouth said ‘cunt’ instead.

Nailed it.

turkeyinacan:

shoutout to people working weekends and overnights and overtime, people working in hospitality and retail and food service, who are sacrificing time with their loved ones, so fuckers with weekday desk jobs get to live comfortably with the amenities we provide while simultaneously shitting all over us for not getting “real jobs”

kyubiisaan:

lowwbloods:

officialwillowpape:

i searched up ‘hurdlers without hurdles’ on google and i dont regret it

these boots are made for walkin

The ol razzle dazzle

kyubiisaan:

lowwbloods:

officialwillowpape:

i searched up ‘hurdlers without hurdles’ on google and i dont regret it

these boots are made for walkin

The ol razzle dazzle

Similar to the idea of Where’s Waldo, a Tumblr page called Subtle Dildo is posting random, ordinary pictures with a special hidden object. Can you find the dildo?

diamond-dcgs:

*dr who theme*

insertawesome-url-here:

eyecandybutts:

#the first chicks just like yeah all right lets get physically fit #the second woman is ready to slit somebody’s throat #the third guy just watched the second woman slit someone he loves throat #and the fourth guy is having explosive diarrhea and hoping to distract himself from the pain #using this level forty fist nunchuck

and at level 70 you fucking animorph into a gorilla

insertawesome-url-here:

eyecandybutts:

#the first chicks just like yeah all right lets get physically fit #the second woman is ready to slit somebody’s throat #the third guy just watched the second woman slit someone he loves throat #and the fourth guy is having explosive diarrhea and hoping to distract himself from the pain #using this level forty fist nunchuck

and at level 70 you fucking animorph into a gorilla